Tuesday, January 11, 2011

1-11-11

Lauren was a wish-maker. She wished on first and falling stars, lucky clovers, coins in wells or fountains, lucky pennies, eyelashes on your cheek, necklace clasps that had rotated to the front, birthday candles, "bumps" on the head, feet raised over railroad tracks, numbers that repeated in sequence (as in today's 1-11-11 date), and any other 'excuse' she knew of. All of these, and others I haven't been able to recall were moments to close her eyes, express a desire in her heart, and blow ... or whatever else she had to do to make the 'wish' come true.
It wasn't until the Make-A-Wish foundation approached Lauren about making a wish that it dawned on me that most, if not all of the wishes Lauren was making were wishes for others instead of herself. Her unhesitating response was "I wish to give my wish away!" And, repeated efforts to get her to think of herself were in vain as she continually tried to maneuver a way to focus on the wishes for someone else.
I don't know of a child with a life-threatening illness who wouldn't wish that they didn't have the illness. I'm sure that Lauren didn't want to have cancer and yet, even this wish was foreign to her. A conversation about her illness was more like debate as I told her I would do everything and anything to take her illness away and she countered that she wouldn't trade her life for anyone's. The only concession she would make was that she wished I (and the rest of her family) didn't have to endure her illness. (Although, she was able to find silver linings in that too.) Again, the wish was about others, not her.
The wish we were able to get Lauren to make that was "about her" STILL involved others more than herself. She determined to do something that would raise awareness, concern and funds to help other families with life-threatening illness. For, as Lauren told me after I questioned if she couldn't possibly think of something for herself ... "Mom, my wishes have all come true."
In order to complete her wish for others in need, she determined to complete at least one of two books she had in her heart which she had become convinced would 'help other people's wishes come true.' Unfortunately, she didn't get the opportunity to accomplish the "means" in order to get to the "end." Make-A-Wish foundation does "not fulfill wishes for families of already deceased children." So, I am committed to fulfilling this wish in my angel daughter's honor.
Lauren's two books: "Happily Ever After (The Power of Perspective)" (a teen / adult book) and "I Love MOO!" (a book for children) should be available in the next few weeks. Pre-orders would really help an awareness of production time, and would be appreciated. (These books will be available through an on-line service.) All proceeds will go through the Living Lauren's Legacy foundation to benefit Lauren's favorite charitable organizations, including those who serve children with life-threatening illnesses, and service research and awareness for Childhood Cancer amongst others. Giving Lauren's wish away will accomplish what she had intended from the beginning.
It is interesting to note that Lauren, in so many significant ways, actually DID accomplish her wish to make other people's wishes come true. These books will only be two in a long list of wishes her selfless, loving life granted for others. Lauren's response to her last treatments have changed the world for all children with her same cancer, as well as many other types of cancer. Her willingness to fight for life has given many others more of a chance, with much less of the severe consequences of the more harsh treatments. She has indeed, just as she wished, made a huge difference with her heartfelt desire to make others wishes come true. It wasn't as simple as a momentary close of eyes and a blow of breath ... but she did what she had to do. And, even though some wishes don't come true if you 'tell' them ... some wishes won't come true unless you do. This is the purpose of the foundation and the efforts to accomplish her 'wish.'
Thank you for your help in making it possible.
melodie@webbtours.com